Through the Eyes of Grace

30. September 2012 · 26 comments · Categories: Anxiety, Gratitude Community

After a weekend away, I arrive home to a sleeping house. It’s after 11 at night but even in the dark I can see it waiting for me. I know to expect it and have already prepared myself.

And what a mess it is.

Laundry covers every surface of the living room, some of which lies on the floor when someone sat on the couch and tossed the clothes out of their way. The kitchen counters are hidden beneath a mountain of mail, Sunday school coloring pages, and other random items. The table is sticky and cereal crunches on the floor under my feet. The kid’s toys are scattered about and I dare not enter the school room where the list of lessons I had left remain untouched.

This kind of chaos used to leave me a twisted wreck inside. When my kids were little and I went out with friends for the evening, returning to messes like this, often made me think, “What’s the point in leaving for relaxation only to return to this?” Every bit of peace I had gathered while I was out would immediately rush out like air from a balloon, leaving me deflated and discouraged.

Since God opened my eyes to see all things through the eyes of grace, I now see this mess differently. Learning to rejoice and give thanks in all things has changed my perspective. Instead of only seeing the chaos, I now see what did happen while I was gone.The laundry covering all the living room surfaces show me that my husband was considerate to wash clothes. The piles scattered around the house tell me that they had fun together. I see the wet suits drying in the bathroom, knowing it means that they went for a swim. Grass speckled sneakers lie next to the door, showing me that they made it to soccer. I see their thoughtfulness in the empty sink and the dishwasher with the clean light on. I also see that they ate all the food I had made for them to eat while I was away. All a trail of grace left for me to accept with gratitude.

Where chaos, mess, and disorganization once put me on edge, now I see it as evidence of life lived full. They are signs of two boys learning, imagining, and laughing. It reveals the gift of family and of a husband who makes a way for me to go out of town, despite any inconvenience to him.

Sometimes the messes in life can be redeemed through the eyes of grace. Seeing all things, even the messes, as gifts from the Father can transform an anxiety filled heart to one of peace. Living life in the moment, with gratitude, makes the chaos of life a gift to be treasured.

I did my best the next day to make some sense of the tornado that touched down in the house. In between catching up with school work, a doctor’s appointment, and errands, I picked up little by little. By evening though, the laundry still lay all over the living room. Figuring I would tackle it the next day, I drove the kids to Cub Scouts. Pulling into the parking lot, I was surprised to find my husband there because I didn’t think he would have time to go. He took the kids inside and suggested I go on home. And in the quiet of the evening, I folded all the laundry and put it away. Counting each shirt and each sock as gifts, seen only through the eyes of grace.

Counting in community (#1847-1859):

Feeling overwhelmed but knowing that God will help me get everything done that He wants done

The kid’s developing sense of humor

Celebrating my oldest’s eighth birthday

Going through his old scrapbooks with him

Attending a friend’s wedding

Staying at one of my favorite hotels and my husband surprising me with a visit to the spa

A relaxing massage at the hotel’s spa

visiting with old college friends

A friend bringing food over for dinner

Pumpkin crisp for dessert:)

Ending the weekend sick, but knowing God will work out everything left undone

My husband pushing back his flight out of town so that I could rest and get better

 

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The Scenic Route

 

 

 

 

 

 

He Reigns

28. September 2012 · 11 comments · Categories: Ploughing Hearts


I enjoyed a hike last weekend at Great Falls, outside Washington, D.C. The falls roared as they rushed over the rocks and boulders. I wondered if it’s anything like the sound of those in heaven, singing praises to our God.

“Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns.” Revelation 19:6

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Teach Me Jesus Thursdays: Where are you going?

27. September 2012 · 2 comments · Categories: Parenting, Teach Me Jesus

My son loves maps. My in-laws are world travelers and I think he has inherited all their travel guides and maps. When my husband and I were in Paris last year, our train map became our most essential tool in getting around the city. Each time we wanted to visit a museum, we consulted the train map to see which route to take from our hotel.

We all know how important a map is in helping us get to our destination. Nowadays, the GPS is used more than an actual paper map. We simply type in the address of where we want to go and the GPS provides us detailed directions for getting there.

When it comes to parenting, I know I could use a map to tell me where to go. Like all Christian parents, I have the general goal of raising my children to know and love the Lord. And like other parents, I would like my children to work hard at all they do and grow to become productive citizens. Yet it’s one thing to have a general goal for the future and it’s another thing to intentionally take the steps to get there.

So where do you want to go as a parent?

While Scripture doesn’t give us the detailed and specific steps to take in our everyday parenting, it does point us in the direction we need to go. Deuteronomy 6 tells us that parents are to teach and train their children to know and love God. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” Deuteronomy 6:5-7 Over and over, throughout the Bible, God instructs His people to teach and remind their children about all that God has done.

I believe it is helpful to have a framework, or philosophy of parenting out of which flows all the practical, day-to-day aspects of raising children. More than just a nebulous goal, a parenting philosophy is founded on Scripture and guides the family on the path God has placed them.

Like a company’s mission statement, having a parenting philosophy gives us a filter through which to make the day-to-day parenting decisions. When a challenge faces us, we can sift our potential responses through our philosophy to determine if our decisions will keep us on the path we are headed.

To develop your own parenting philosophy:

Begin with Scripture to instruct you in what God desires from your family and your children. Where do you believe God wants to direct you as a family? What is your calling as a family? What do you most want to instill in your children? How do you want your family to reflect love to each other and to those outside your family? What defines your family?

Sometimes it helps to put your philosophy into an acronym or a list of statements. Or perhaps it is a list of Bible passages that summarize your philosophy. Whatever form it takes, refer back to it often to remind yourself of where you are headed. Use it when making decisions in how to respond to your children and in the plans you make for them.

An example:

For our family, we believe parenting should be focused on grace. The foundation of the gospel is grace and our parenting should be as well. We are the first and primary example of God’s love to our kids. When we live out the grace of the gospel, they see Christ in us. Below is an acronym to describe our philosophy.

G Gospel centered

R Reaching the heart

A Affirming God’s image

C Christ like humility

E Evaluating our example

Gospel Centered: What does gospel centered parenting look like? It means continually pointing our kids to the cross and what Christ did for them. It means reminding ourselves as parents of the grace given to us. It means we as parents in turn extend grace to our children when they fall, reminding them of Christ’s death for their sin, and the empowering work of the Holy Spirit to change them. It means preaching the gospel to ourselves and to our children every day.

Reaching the heart: Parenting isn’t so much about responding or reacting to behavior or molding a child to fit societal norms. It’s about reaching beyond mere behavior and to the heart of the child. Scripture says that it’s not mere outward conformity that God is seeking, it’s a broken and contrite heart. You can have a child who is behaves perfectly on the outside, yet their heart is far from God. “You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” Psalm 51: 16,17

Affirming God’s image in them: While the world may praise their kids to build their self-esteem, we want our kids to view themselves the way God views them: as precious eternal souls made in his image. Our children were made to glorify and enjoy God. I want to always point them to their Maker and the fact that the gifts, skills, and talents they have come from him and are for him. Each person has a calling in their life that they are to use for his glory and our role as parents is to encourage and nurture those gifts and help them find a way to use their skills for God.

Christ like humility: Christ led his disciples through service. He taught servanthood and led by example. Parenting requires significant sacrifice and is primarily about servanthood. We not only need to teach our children about humility and putting others before themselves, but we also need to set an example of service in our home and in our community.

Evaluating our example: We also want to evaluate our interactions with our children each day. Are we showing them Jesus through how we respond to them, how we handle our own sin, how we handle trials and disappointments, how we handle conflicts with others, etc.? Many times we will fail. We then fall on our knees and ask the Lord for forgiveness and strength to try again. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we are able to persevere in our job as parents.

Does your family have a specific philosophy of parenting? What does it look like? If not, what would you want your philosophy to look like?

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Show Them Jesus

26. September 2012 · 1 comment · Categories: Parenting, Teach Me Jesus

You know you’ve had a bad day when your child prays that God would give you patience. Have you been there?

My days are spent rushing from one thing to the next and trying to get my kids to keep up with me. I am irritable and short. I get frustrated by whatever slows me down. And as my son pointed out, I get impatient.

To read the rest of this post, visit Leaving A Legacy where I am guest posting today.

 

Respectable Sins Book Study: Week 3

25. September 2012 · Write a comment · Categories: Book Study

Welcome back! For those who are still hanging in there, we are doing chapters 5 and 6 this week of Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate. These are the last two chapters before getting into the nitty-gritty mess of our ‘respectable’ sins. In these chapters, Bridges reminds us that we are not alone in our battle against sin. We’ve been given the Holy Spirit to help us put our sins to death. He also gives us practical ideas on what steps to take as we battle each of our respectable sins.

Questions for you to journal in response to these chapters:

Chapter 5

1. Bridges reminds us that the only reason we can even fight against sin is because we have been forgiven. God forgives us not because He is being lenient, but because His justice has been satisfied. How does this truth that God has forgiven our sin free us to face sin?

2. We are cleansed from both our sin’s power and as well as our guilt from sin. On page 39, Bridges explains that we’ve been delivered from the dominance of sin and have been freed from the remaining presence of sin. Were you aware of this two-part cleansing before reading this chapter? What is your response to this truth? Read Romans 6 for a more detailed look.

3. Though sin is dethroned as the reigning power over our lives, it still seeks to exert a controlling influence in our daily walk. (Don’t I know it!) What does it mean to walk by the Spirit? (read Galatians 5:6)

4. How the Spirit works:

  • He brings conviction of sin through our reading of Scripture and through our conscience. Have you ever had this happen where you are reading God’s word and feel a sense of conviction about what you have just read?
  • He enables and empowers us to deal with sin-How can we be sure that the Holy Spirit will help us deal with sin and direct our spiritual transformation? (read Romans 8:31, Philippians 1:6, 2:12-13)
  • He brings circumstances into our lives that give us opportunity to battle with sin-If I am facing my sin of irritability and frustration, He may give me opportunity to battle that, maybe even through my children’s behavior. How have you seen that in your own life?
  • He works in us monergistically-that is, on His own (see the end of p. 43)

5. Sometimes, It seems as though the Spirit is not at work. Have you ever felt that way, like you are in this battle on your own? Be confident that even if you don’t feel Him at work, He always is (2 Cor. 3:18)

6. How important is understanding God’s sovereignty to this battle against sin? (see p. 44)

Chapter 6

Directions for dealing with sins: Bridges gives us a list in this chapter to use as we go through the rest of the book. It may help to write down this list on a 3×5 card and keep it in the book to look at as a reminder.

1. Always address sin in the context of the gospel (read Romans 7:21-25)

2. Learn to rely on the enabling power of the Holy Spirit (read Romans 8:13)

3. We need to recognize our responsibility to pursue all the practical steps for dealing with our sins. “Work as if it all depends on you and yet trust as if you did not work at all.” (read Philippians 4:8-9, Colossians 3:5)

4. Identify specific areas of acceptable sins.

5. Apply specific applicable Scriptures to each sin (Psalm 119:11, 14-15)

6. Cultivate the practice of prayer over the sins we tolerate (Philippians 4:4-7) Pray during planned, consistent times as well as pray short spontaneous prayers asking for the Spirit’s help.

7. Involve one or more other believers in the struggle against sin (read 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Hebrews 10:24)

And for discussion with community: What spoke to you most out of these chapters? Has the Spirit already began the work in helping you identify areas of sin? Do you have anyone in your life with whom you can walk this journey together?

 

 

Because We Can’t Get Everything Right

23. September 2012 · 42 comments · Categories: God's still working on me, Gratitude Community

source

It was one of those days, the kind of day where nothing goes right. After the second tantrum in a row, I looked at my son and said, “You are going to have to calm down and get control of yourself or you’ll miss out on visiting your friends later.” It had been a busy morning and he was tired. I was tired too, especially of his emotional outbursts. He frowned, shook his head and said in a tearful voice, “Mommy, I can’t stop. I can’t get control of myself.”

My almost five-year old often has more insight than I do. As he’s reminded me before, he can’t always obey. This is a truth that took me many years to learn.

I can’t get everything right.

My pastor said recently, “You are not made holy by something you don’t do, but by something Jesus has done.” My growth as a Christian doesn’t happen because I stop a particular sin or get myself under control. Rather, it’s Jesus perfect life given to me. It’s His sacrificial death that secured for me a place at the feet of my Abba. And it’s because of Jesus that my Father looks at me and sees righteousness.

The ladies in my Bible study at my church have been discussing this in great detail. How do we grow in holiness? I used to live as though Jesus only saved me from eternal punishment, now it’s up to me to become a better person. Sometimes people view Christianity as an opportunity for a fresh start. They think that Jesus wipes the slate clean and they get to start over again. But this time, they better get it right. They try hard to be a “good Christian” and follow all the rules.

Only that’s not the gospel.

Tullian Tchividjian has said, “Christianity is not about good people getting better. If anything, it is good news for bad people coping with their failure to be good.” In reality, I’m actually more sinful than I think I am. But I’m also more loved than I could even imagine. No matter what I do, I will fail at perfection. I won’t get everything right. And that’s why Jesus came.

He knew that no matter how hard I tried, I could never be good enough. Out of His abundant grace, He took my place and was perfect for me. I’ve learned that no matter how much I sin, His grace is greater. No matter how many times I fall and fail Him, He forgives and covers it with His righteousness.

Once I finally learned that I cannot grow in holiness on my own and that I needed the power of the gospel and the Spirit’s work in and through me, I felt set free. Because trying to do it on my own was like running a race while being chained in place. Who can do that?

Living the Christian life then becomes a journey in remembrance. Just as the Israelites celebrated feasts to remember the ways God had delivered them and provided for them, each day of my life is a celebration of remembering the gospel of grace. Because I am so forgetful, I need frequent reminders. I need to begin and end my day recalling who I am because of Christ. I need to remember that it is because of Him that I have been set free. I don’t have to try harder, do better, or renew my resolve, for He has already done it for me. Each time I remember who I am, dwelling on His love for me, it overwhelms my heart with love for all He has done. What grace! What mercy! My love for Him spills over with gratitude and a desire to love and obey. This desire for Christ is what spurs me on to transform, to shed layers of sin, to walk into the refiner’s fire, to change into who He has already made me to be.

Because that’s what growth in holiness really is, becoming who we already are in Christ.

Sometimes I need my children to remind me that they can’t do it either. When my son reminded me that he was struggling and couldn’t win the battle that day, I said to him, “You’re right. You can’t. But God can. Let’s pray for His power to help you.”

Remembering today that I can’t, but God can, and He did.

Counting His endless grace #1833-1845

The gift of remembrance

Bringing our Pizza Night Family Dinner Game to the pizza restaurant and playing as a family

The amazing discussions we are having in Bible study

My son loving the Lord of the Rings books

Pursuing my passion

Going out of town by myself to visit family in DC

Quiet hotel room, quiet car, just quiet

Going to my sister’s bridal shower

Celebrating my moms birthday

Visiting my old church and hanging out with an old friend

Hiking at Great Falls park

Perfect Fall weather

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The Scenic Route

 

 

 

 

 

 
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The Love of God

21. September 2012 · 13 comments · Categories: Ploughing Hearts

“Could we with ink the ocean fill,
And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill,
And every man a scribe by trade
To write the love of God above
Would drain the ocean dry;
Nor coul the scroll contain the whole,
Tho stretched from sky to sky.”

From: “The Love of God” by Frederick M. Lehman, 1917

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To Walk Alongside the Hurting

18. September 2012 · 20 comments · Categories: Anxiety, Depression, friendship, grief, Spiritual Growth

You’ve seen her before. The one who always sits in the back at church. She averts her gaze, fearful that her eyes will give away all her secrets. She never says much and quickly goes on her way. You want to help, to reach out, but you’re not sure…what if her problems are too much? What if you don’t know what to say? And what if her problems remind you too much of your own?

Source

Scripture calls us as Christians to love one another in the Body, to build one another up, encourage one another, and spur one another on in the faith. It’s hard to do those things for people we barely know. When small talk is the deepest level we’ve gone, we can’t encourage or build up another person. For some circles, it’s not acceptable to be real and honest. We keep our problems and secrets to ourselves. Perhaps we’ve been hurt or misunderstood in the past. Maybe we don’t even know how to let someone else in to see who we really are.

God has given us one another in the body of Christ to speak words of truth and hope into each other’s soul. When two people who have the Spirit residing within them share real life with one another, there is a power at work within them. When we go beneath the surface and speak life affirming words to one another, it stirs the Spirit within, awakening hope.

God will often bring someone into our lives with whom He wants us to encourage. It’s never an accident when we are put in the path of someone who is hurting. When that happens and you wonder what to do…

1. Just listen: You don’t have to know the answer to their problems. You don’t have to take away their pain. You are not there to make their life all better. Just be present. Listen without judgement. Don’t be like Job’s friends who assumed they knew why Job was suffering.

2. Look beneath and to what is happening in the heart: Seek to really know them and what is going on in their heart. Get past the superficial. Find out what God is doing in their life. Explore with them where they are in the journey. Everyone’s story takes them down different roads. What is their story? How is God drawing them closer to Himself? How is He shaping and molding them?

3. Encourage them with the truths of the Gospel: You may not be able to solve their immediate crisis, problem, or circumstance, but you can remind them of the truths that never shake or falter no matter how much the circumstances may cause them to tremble. Truth: they are a treasured possession of God (Ephesians 1:14, Isaiah 43:1), Truth: they are a dearly loved child of the Father (Ephesians 5:1), Truth: they are a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17), Truth: they are an heir of the Kingdom (Galatians 4:7), Truth: they are pure and holy in the sight of God (1 Corinthians 1:30), and Truth: God will continue the work He started in them (Philippians 1:6).

4. Pray with and for them: Ask to pray for them, out loud or even write a prayer down to give them. Be sincere. Too often in our Christian circles we say we will pray for someone and then fail to do so. Ask for specific things you can pray about. Pray for the power of the Gospel to be alive and at work in their life. Pray that they would remember and appropriate the truths listed above.

5. Be real yourself: It is hard for someone to be honest with us if they look at us as though we are perfect and that we have it all together. Be honest about your own battles and the way God has worked through them. Show them that you, like them, are imperfect, yet saved by grace. We are all messes. We all struggle and falter. But we have the same Savior who died to rescue us.

We need each other. We can’t do this journey all alone. God gave us community in the Body of Christ to help us run the race. Sometimes, we ourselves will stumble and need a fellow traveler to help us back up. Other times, God will call us to encourage someone else who is struggling. Let’s reach out to those who are hurting, trusting Christ to give us the wisdom and encouraging words to say. May we strive to be a community of mutual, authentic, and transparent believers who seek to do life together.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

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and Intentional.Me

 

Respectable Sins Study: Week 2

18. September 2012 · 2 comments · Categories: Book Study

So friends, how are you doing with this book? This week we are looking at chapters 3 and 4. This is the quote that has been on my mind all week, “Shall we presume on God’s grace by tolerating in ourselves the very sin that nailed Christ to the cross?” (p.29)

Questions for you to journal in response to these chapters:

1. Bridges compares sin to that of cancer. How does cancer behave similarly to sin? How have you seen sin “metastasize” from yourself to the hearts of others?

2. Can you add any more adjectives to describe sin to those listed on page 26?

3. “When we see how really bad the bad news is, we’ll be in a better position to appreciate how really good the good news is.” Bridges spends part of this chapter focusing on the holiness of God. This is to help us see why sin is such a serious thing. He says, “our sin is an assault on the majesty and sovereign rule of God.” He also uses the term ’cosmic treason.’ What is your response to this?

4. Read these passages on God’s holiness: Isaiah 6, Revelation 4 and Isaiah 40

5. In chapter four, Bridges focuses on the hope we have in the gospel. He says that our only hope and remedy is that we are great sinners with a great Savior. How is the gospel the remedy for our current sins?

a). it plows the ground of our hearts to see our sin b). it frees us to do so and c). it motivates and energizes us to deal with our sin

6. He says “duty without desire soon becomes drudgery.” So where does our desire to deal with sin come from (p.36)?

7. Bridges urges us to “preach the gospel to yourself every day.” How does this help us confront our respectable sins?

8. To aid in preaching the gospel to yourself this week, consider this quote from Bridges, imagining God is saying this to your heart: “We are going to work on that sin, but meanwhile I want you to know that I no longer count it against you.”

Read these verses as you remind yourself of the gospel: Psalm 103:12, Psalm 130:3-4, Isaiah 43:25, Isaiah 53:6, Micah 7:19, Romans 4:7-8, Romans 8:1, Colossians 2:13-14, Hebrews 8:12, Hebrews 10:17-18

For us to discuss in community: what stood out to you the most in these chapters? how has God been convicting your heart? Have you been preaching the gospel to yourself?

Draw Near

16. September 2012 · 24 comments · Categories: Gratitude Community

“You better schedule an appointment tomorrow.” It was these words from my husband that I recalled as I laid out flat, wincing in pain with every move.

I remembered my response too. “I don’t have any time.”

Having chronic back problems for years, I know I what I need to do to keep it from going out on me. It had been bothering me for a few days before we went out-of-town to a water park. It only took one simple, not too rough, family tube ride to put me in tears. After a visit to the First Aid station, I laid down with my pack of ice and remembered my husband’s advice from a few days before.

When life gets busy, I put my own needs to the side. I do this not only with my health, but with my spiritual walk as well.

On the busiest of days, my eyes catch sight of my Bible I think, “I just don’t have time right now, I’ll sit down and read later.” Challenging issues arise during my day and I try to push my way through instead of pausing to pray. I feel disconnected and overwhelmed and rather than run to my Abba, I grumble, complain, and despair.

And just like my back when I fail to take care of it, my soul begins to suffer. I become weak in the face of the enemy’s lies. I may even become immobilized, sapped of spiritual strength.

Just like my body needs food for energy, my soul needs nourishment to stay healthy. In the same way that my physical health needs to be maintained, so too does my spiritual health. I need constant communion with God in the same way that I need air to breathe.

Why do I think that I can make it through the day without my Savior?

I should know from past experience that every time I try to live my life in my own strength, I fail. Everytime I tell God that I will check in with Him later, I get lost. And every time I try to go forward in the journey without soul nourishment, I stumble and fall.

Oh, what a stubborn learner I am! As Paul said, “Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 7:24-25) But for grace, I would be a hopeless mess. But because of grace, I am a perfect mess.

No matter how many times I fail to sup at the table with my Savior, feeding on His Words, He always keeps my place set. And when I do arrive, thirsty and famished, wounded and in despair, He is there waiting. There I am strengthened, receiving nourishment and rest for my soul.

Thankful today for this truth: “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.” James 4:8

Joining the gratitude community (#1820-1832 ):

my wonderful, fabulous chiropractor

my son who waited patiently for over an hour while I received my treatment

the sweet lady in the Target parking lot who saw that I left items in my cart and stopped me as I started to drive away

the start of my ladies Bible study

the great discussion and time of sharing

our babysitter back in town after two months away:)

a fun start to our homeschool Apologia coop

girls night out, dinner by the water

pumpkin pie bagel

broken garage door repaired

slightly cooler temperatures

my car breaking down while my husband was available to help me

 

Linking up with my friends at:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Scenic Route

 

 

 

 

 

 

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