Yesterday, I met with the person at the school district who runs much of the gifted program for the county. I was able to get some questions answered and talk about Ethan’s options. Mostly I signed paperwork and left with more paperwork to sign. I am feeling empathetic to all my former clients who had to sign the mountains of paperwork I used to give them. While I was there, George was at the Christian school, registering Ethan for this fall. If we end up changing our mind, we’ll lose a large registration fee. It looks like there will be more meetings down the road. Having attended many an ESE IEP meeting, I imagine ours will be similar (though hopefully more positive).

The other day a friend referred to gifted kids as “weird.” She didn’t know what we’ve been going through in recent weeks. But it got me thinking, is Ethan weird? He’s the only five year old I hang out with on a regular basis so I don’t have much to compare to. But the books I’ve been reading do say that gifted kids are often teased because the things they enjoy are different from other kids their age. I heard Ethan yesterday tell a friend “you know it’s a challenge to use the bathroom when you are in the space shuttle because of gravity.” One book pointed out that the very definition of a peer is different for gifted kids because they have peers who are there own age who they really want to fit in with and play with but aren’t understood by them and there are peers who are like them and think the same way. I guess that’s why a lot of schools group gifted kids together in a class to themselves, though this encourages the “weirdness” reputation. Though I’ve read gifted kids quoted as saying that they really love being around kids who are just like them because those kids understand their fascination with learning. I’ve read gifted kids described as “old souls” because of their concerns with problems in the world, death and afterlife, etc. I’m thinking that Ethan will definitely be considered different-the only cartoon he likes is “Magic School Bus” and his favorite channel is the science channel. He has educated us as to the name of the largest plane in the world-The Antenov. He adds and subtracts in his head, while I have to use my fingers. Most kids his age are collecting Bakugans. He got some for his birthday but could care less about them. So when he gets teased by other kids, I will have to point out to him that Jesus did not call us to be just like everyone else and we have to remain faithful to do what he has called us to do. And try to point out that not everyone enjoys the same things or is skilled in the same things. Monet probably didn’t excel in basketball and the best photographers may not love calculus. I mean look at mommy she has her Master’s but still counts using her fingers!

Yesterday we met again with the principal at the Christian school we are looking into sending Ethan to. We gave him Ethan’s psych. eval. and shared with him what the Dr. had suggested to us regarding Ethan’s education. He was very open to trying to make adjustments to what they normally do with kindergarteners so that Ethan can remain challenged. He was totally fine with Ethan leaving one day a week to attend an enrichment program at the public school. We also spoke with the kindergarten teacher who agreed that Ethan would benefit from going to the first grade for math and possibly science. We will be meeting with them again soon, this time with the first grade teacher too. The principal will test Ethan soon so see what math and reading level he is at. Next week I’m meeting with the person who is in charge of the gifted program for the county to talk about the enrichment program. We are trying to be cautious about how we talk about all of this and to keep from talking about it in front of Ethan (don’t need any big heads). He’s been complaining about boredom in his pre-k class again so his teacher switched from a kindergarten curriculum for him to a first grade one, hopefully this will keep him stimulated. He has a long academic road in front of him that will be frustrating at many times along the way. I’ve been reading how much gifted kids hate the repetitive nature of traditional education and find it irrelevent. And how they hate worksheets. He has thousands of worksheets ahead of him…

I ordered a couple of books on gifted kids recently and have found them to be SO enlightening. I realized after Ethan saw the psychologist that I never had any training with working with gifted kids. Sure we studied IQ testing in school and discussed the theories and statistics behind it, but nothing on how to help a person who has a high IQ. (if it’s not in the Diagnotic and Statistical Manuel of Psychiatric Disorders, we didn’t learn it:). The adults and children I’ve counseled were always of average intelligence or borderline. Needless to say, I have learned a lot and it has explained SO much about Ethan. I really wish I had known this when he was 2, it would have really helped. Gifted kids often have particular personality traits and as I read through them it was like reading a biography on Ethan. Sensitivity, high emotionality, having to have tags cut off clothes, concerns about death and afterlife, the why questions that never stop, always off in his own little world “thinking,” always correcting others, constant need for mental stimulation, being able to play well with older kids, etc. Last night George and I met with the psycholigist to get some advice on how to help Ethan educationally as well as get parenting advice. We mapped out his entire educational career through college. We decided on a few different scenarios for kindergarten so next we need to schedule some meetings to get things rolling. It’s pretty complicated, how do you help a kid who starts kindergarten in the fall who really is intellectually in 3rd grade? We’ve realized that we don’t have anyone to talk to about these issues. George met someone through his work whose child has the same IQ and he found it to be really helpful to talk to someone who has been through these decisions. The meeting last night was very helpful and I really like the psychologist. He gave us a lot of info. on how to raise Ethan and what to expect down the road. Our next challenge is how to explain all of this to Ethan in an appropriate way because his educational career is going to be pretty non-traditional and he’ll have to adjust to being “different.”

In my last post I mentioned that Ian was sick, well I ended up getting sick too. It’s amazing how everything stops and just the basics become important when you are sick. I do have to say that a shower is still a necessity for me:) In the midst of this, we’ve been making some progress with our decisions regarding school for Ethan in the fall. We have both come to agreement about wanting a Christian education so we toured and interviewed the principal from a local Christian school. We were very pleased with what we learned there. We’re just not sure if they will be able to offer the enrichment opportunities that it seems Ethan will need. His preschool teachers the past few years have repeatedly said that he will be bored in kindergarten and that we need to test him prior to kindergarten so that he will be put in an enrichment program right away. I’m not sure how I feel about that. It could be that the reason he is so ahead is because of the supplementing we have done at home and that his peers will catch up to him in kindergarten. Or maybe he does have an above average IQ and will need to be challenged so that he doesn’t get bored and cause problems in the classroom. His current teacher, as I’ve mentioned before, is wonderful. She has a separate curriculum just for him that he does when the rest of the class is doing their work. We know that won’t happen in kindergarten so that’s where is gets tricky. So I have him scheduled for some testing this week so we’ll see what happens with that and maybe that will point us in the right direction. Here’s quote from John Piper that helps put this and everything really into perspective “As soon as we discover we have a problem, God has already been working on it and the solution is on the way.” Enough said.